I know I know, it took me awhile to get around to my blog. Apologies to all my readers, life has been crazy.
I’ve always written that I want to be honest and true to myself in my writing, otherwise what’s the point? It really was a rough summer for me and a personal low. I think I already wrote about my new ulcer, if I haven’t just know that I have a new ulcer. I think it was July when I landed back in the hospital and my labs were really good so I thought I would be going home, I didn’t realize that right behind me my blood pressure decided to do something ridiculous like be 50/30, so once again I found myself in ICU.
I think I’ve always made it clear to everyone that I’m a chronic pain patient in pain management and on some pretty heavy pain medication, and when I can’t keep anything down that includes my pain medicine so by the time I get to the ER I’m in pretty rough shape from the pain. However I knew there wasn’t a lot they could do for me with my low bp, but by the next morning it was back to normal. The doctor came in to make rounds and I asked him to put me back on my oral pain meds or injections and imagine my surprise when he said no that every time I’m in the hospital I’m on morphine and I was a drug seeker. Really? I had my meds in my purse not 5 feet away from me. I explained that to him to no avail. I was so upset I left and I just managed to stay out of the hospital until last night. A couple of trips to the ER aside.
evidently, he was the only doctor on staff who felt that way, because every time I’ve been in the ER I’ve been given pain meds and no, I didn’t ask for them. I guess I’m now a little defensive about the whole damn subject.
Last week, my husband had to have arthroscopic surgery on his left knee and he’s been out of work for the better part of a month and I can’t remember a time when we’ve been this broke. Don’t get me wrong, we’re getting by day by day but wondering where the grocery money is going to come from is stressing us both out. Did I mention we’re supposed to move in about 11 days and I have no idea where the money to close is going to come from? I’m keeping the faith the Lord will provide.
It’s been a rough couple of weeks. Rudy had to take me to the ER four times I think, and I was admitted twice. I simply could not stop vomiting. The phenergan doesn’t seem to be working as well as it did. In fact one doctor gave me a shot of Thorazine, that knocked me out for a good 6 hours. As soon as I woke up though I was still throwing up.
I could go into ketoacidosis very easily, fortunately I never got to that point. The gastroparesis has gotten really bad even though my glucose readings are good.
I had to have some minor surgery, I was discharged the same day and damned if I wasn’t back in the hospital the next day. I have to follow up with a gastroenterologist.
What scared my husband is that I went over a week without eating anything. Chicken water and jello doesn’t count. He’s watching me lose more and more weight and it really does bother him.
On the other hand I’m feeling much better now and I’m looking forward to spending time with him.
I found out more things from my hospitalization in March when I was on the ventilator. My nurse told me I was septic and the reason I was so combative was that I wasn’t breathing. That’s not what was in my head though. In my head I just wanted them to slow down and tell me what they were doing. evidently there was no time for that. I’m still having some anxiety over all that, but it is getting better.
I’m looking forward to this week with my husband, thanks for listening.
On New Year‘s Eve I found myself stuck on an er gurney for about 9 hours waiting on an icu bed. While it wasn’t much fun for me, it did give me insight into the many patients that came and went while I was waiting. It was these people that gave me insight into what Nurse K and ER Doc go through all the time.
I’ll start with the upper 20 something woman that came in at 3am with an ear ache. Really? An ear ache is what brings you to the er at 3am? On New Year’s Eve? Yes, the pain was so bad it woke her out of a sound sleep. How is an ear ache an emergency? Was it falling off? Bleeding? Was there brain matter leaking out of it? No? Then take some motrin, take some tylenol and go back to sleep, and see your doctor on Tuesday. It’s not like I’m trying to eavesdrop but it’s a curtain, not a wall people.
This brings me to my favorite guy of the night. I didn’t catch his birthdate so couldn’t tell you his age, but if I have to guess it’s close to mine. He was right after earache girl and he said that he was there because his wife told him he had not one, but 2 seizures the last one about an hour before he came in. It did leave me to wonder where his wife was that he had to drive himself in. After further questioning his seizure are now more like blackouts and the real reason he came in became quite clear to me. Seems for the first time in 4 years he was out of his oxycontin and xanax prescription and was hoping the doctor would write him enough to “get by” to see his family doctor. If I wasn’t a 7 out of 10 on the pain scale I would have laughed out loud. It was all I could do not to shout out “Let me know how that works out for you buddy.” He didn’t get his script, instead he got the er doc telling him he was going to have to make a report of his seizure to the Bureau of Motor Vehicles and was probably going to lose his driving privileges until if could be medically documented that he was seizure free for six months and no, calling it a “black out” was not going to change that.
Before I could get any more, my icu bed was ready and I was just happy to be getting off that damn gurney. Happy New Year!
It’s late here, almost 2am and I can’t sleep. I can’t find a comfortable place to put my arm where it doesn’t hurt and I’m dealing with a flare-up of my pancreatitis. The pain is definitely better than last night. Yesterday was just a bad day and one of those rare ones where I could hardly get out of bed. The pain in my left arm has definitely improved. My range of motion still sucks but I think I’ll get some of that back in physical therapy. There’s still a bone spur that has to be addressed, but I’m just not willing to deal with surgery now. Unfortunately, my right arm is still in stage 1 where the pain is continuing to increase and the range of motion in this one is so bad, that it’s impossible to dress myself when I’m home alone. We’ll see what I have left when this cycle is completed.
I was in the hospital twice this month, one overnight stay and a 3 day stint in ICU a week later. As soon as I start to feel better I get very insistent on going home and I wonder if I’m pushing so hard to go home that I’m being released earlier than the hospitalists would like. I would love to hear feedback on that from the doctors and nurses reading. Does a patient’s eagerness to leave influence the decision to send them home perhaps earlier than they would like? The ER doctor I saw last night called me today to see how I was feeling, she really is good to me every time I see her in the hospital and even calls my husband to let him know how I’m doing. It’s much appreciated.
We’re having a midsummer night’s party this weekend and I’m really looking forward to getting out of my head for a while and enjoy my friends who have truly become family to Rudy and me.